As I mentioned in an earlier post, Talia has been living in California since January. Well after being denied visitation once I finally was able to see her over last weekend. I so missed her but the minute she was in my car, it was like she had never even left. I love that she and I are like that!
Well over the last month we had decided to fight for custody instead of just more time. Let me tell you how everything changed..........
As hard as it has been I have tried to be supportive of Talia wanting to be in California. She really felt by going that the relationship with her dad would improve. Sadly she was discovering it was actually getting worse in some ways. She missed me terribly and was angry with him for making it so hard to see me as well as other teenage issues. Well I had stopped asking her if she was sure she wanted to stay until one morning when I could not sleep. I could not get thoughts about her out of my mind. I kept thinking that more time was not what we should be going for. Figuring that Talia was still in the same mind frame as before, this frustrated me further. The more I stewed the stronger the feeling.
Well Talia happened to start texting me that same morning asking me really funny questions about the papers and what exactly I was asking for in them. So on a total whim I told her we had changed our mind and were now fighting for custody. And that I could just not allow all the things that had been happening to continue. Her dad needed to know how wrong it was. And that it had consequences. And to my surprise she agreed! LOL I sat there in confusion and asked her if she was sure and what had changed her mind. She said I was right, it needed to stop and she was ready to do what it took.
Well I proceeded to call my attorney and talk to her about what the steps would be and the cost of doing the custody battle instead. If we were going to do it now was the time.
I then spoke to Mark and told him if we did this that I would happily get a job anywhere to help with it. He agreed as long as I did that he was fine with the decision.
Now the only issue was the job. I had been looking for months. There was nothing that would be worthwhile especially with daycare expenses, so it was a total leap of faith when I called my attorney back and said GO FOR IT!
Now here is the cool part. Within in minutes of getting off the phone with my attorney, I received and email from a company that I had worked at before. They were hiring for the census for 14 + an hour. I immediately posted my resume that night. The very next morning I was sent tests to perform to see if I was eligible to continue with the process. 5 minutes after I had completed the tests, I received a phone call for an interview. During the phone interview I was offered the job as team lead which pays over 15 an hour. And she asked me to come in for the paper work and a final interview the next day. I was offered the position of team lead and accepted it the next day.
I could not believe how everything fell in to place the minute we had made the decision about Talia. I knew then it was meant to happen this way.
So now fast forward to the present. All was going fine. We were waiting for her dad to be served the weekend I had her but it didnt happen. So we figured any day after she got back he would receive the papers. Well instead of a call from my attorney, I received a phone call from Talia's dad. I was a little hesitant to take it. I was grateful at the moment I was busy so he had to leave a message. Well then he sent a text...." You need to call me now. I promise you wont regret it." then "If I were you I would drop whatever you are doing and call." So I called
WOW!!!!! WOW!!!! He was right. I could not believe what I was hearing. MY daughter, the one that said in a million years she would never tell her dad to his face how she felt, did just that!!
I did not even know what to say. In some ways I wanted to jump up and down and hoot and holler, but I also knew her dad had said something that was incredibly difficult for him to do. I was scared to even speak. I didnt want to say something that would in any way rub it in or sound unsympathetic. We talked for quite awhile. I think he needed it. Not sure how much it helped but we shall see. He essentially told me what ever I send he will sign. Never thought I would hear that. He said she doesnt want him to fight anymore. I totally felt for him. As a parent to not fight for our children seems backwards. Hopefully the relationship between Talia and her dad will improve and strengthen.
So long story short!!! My daughter will be home on Thursday!! I will have my whole family together more than it has been for so long. Im sure there will be moments as with any family that we dont see eye to eye! I dont care!! Being a mom is the best thing I have ever been given the privilege of doing!
I want to thank all of my friends and family for all the prayers and all the ears that listened to the never ending drama!!! While I dont think it will ever truly end. It has just been decreased significantly!! And eventually it just might go away all together.
Prayers are answered! The End. This is total proof! And it comes when the time is right. Not when you want it to come! And its perfect!
3 comments:
Oh, Tasha!!!! I am so overjoyed for you and Talia and your family. What a miracle. I love you!
Tasha this is wonderful! Brave little Talia! I bet that was so hard for her... but it looks like it was the RIGHT thing, and I hope it makes her life and relationship with her dad SO much better. Wow! Congratulations!
Thanks you guys!!! I am feeling quite strange right now! After so much struggling I know there will be plenty of things to fill the gap, but it might take some time to get used to. Ashlee- she was so brave and sadly it has not been very easy to deal with them since she has told them. Her dad is not dealing well with the hurt and anger he is feeling. Hopefully things will improve as time goes by.
Im so glad to have such great friends and family even after miles separate us! LOVE YOU!!!!
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